I never claimed to be anyone's goddamn savior.
crossettlibrary:

wnyc:

craigslistdad:

and that’s when it came up and swallowed me millionth dollar

Slow news day.

Bugs, where the heck do you gotta be?

crossettlibrary:

wnyc:

craigslistdad:

and that’s when it came up and swallowed me millionth dollar

Slow news day.

Bugs, where the heck do you gotta be?

beyondtheoath:

Sometimes CAH hits too close to home.

beyondtheoath:

Sometimes CAH hits too close to home.

elfauno:

Finally, some good advice from Cosmo

elfauno:

Finally, some good advice from Cosmo

thenightvalepost:

Monday Black Hole warning. No big deal, just the standard weekly warning that someone will be devoured by the earth. Memorial services will commence immediately as usual.
Tuesday Wind. Panic. Run. Hide. Lock your doors. If the wind howls, knocks, speaks, or touches you… you will be in the…

crayonster:

timeturner:

bex-chan:

you know you’re getting old when you watch the little mermaid and when ariel says “i’m 16 years old. i’m not a child anymore.” and you’re just sat there like yes you fucking are young lady stop it

#DADDY I LOVE HIM #bitch you don’t even know him

The day you start agreeing with the parents in kids movies is the day it’s all over.

I have worked too hard for too long to get here, and I am NOT going to jeopardize it for some garbage boy who got lucky! Got it?

So weird when your best friends from years ago are still best friends with each other but you hardly know either of them anymore

quintessence-of-dust:

Kacy Catanzaro: the first woman in history to qualify for Mt. Midoriyama.

I just need everyone to watch this video [x]. She’s a 5 foot, 100 lb gymnast and she beasts through this insanely difficult, heavily upper body focused course like it was her morning jog. The camera keeps cutting to these massive, musclebound men in the audience with their mouths hanging open. 

nurdsite:

My buddy Tom baked a cake for his Argentinian friend to cheer her up after the world cup loss.
…they are no longer friends.

nurdsite:

My buddy Tom baked a cake for his Argentinian friend to cheer her up after the world cup loss.

…they are no longer friends.